Growing Up

Newborn's First Week

Hello world here I am - please don't be nervous of me that's totally normal - I don't expect you to know how to do everything right away. The most important thing is that you love me, I've arrived safe and sound and everything else will come naturally I am sure.

I will be displaying a wide range of newborn reflexes (some pretty strange, all very normal) and I might be funny-looking (i.e., puffy and/or pointy) after living in your cramped uterus for nine months, then squeezing through the birth canal. I may also drop some weight (about 5 to 10 percent of her birth weight due to normal postdelivery fluid loss) before I start to grow so don't be worried about this.

I may also be very, very sleepy at first, but make the most of this time to take good care of yourself, rest, feed and drink plenty of water. I may not handle breastfeeding or bottle feeding well to start with but persevere and give me lots of cuddles so we can bond together.

1-week-old
My first week is pretty boring - I eat, pee, poo, sleep cry and cry again. This may be distressing for you mum but I need to cry as it's the only way for me to communicate with you. You will soon understand the difference in my cries, I cry differently if I am hungry to when I am uncomfortable and need my nappy changing.

I am probably still doing that weird reflex noise and my umbilical cord may or may not have fallen off (either is normal). I may also have any number of strange skin things going on, from acne to white spots to red blotches. Leave them alone, and they'll go away all by themselves.

One thing that won't go away (at least for a while) are your big, tender boobs if you're breastfeeding. To help cope with any discomfort, remind yourself how good breast milk is for me and make sure you wear a good nursing bra that fits right.

2-weeks-old
I'm hungry, in fact I'm always hungry at the moment, food is helping with my first growth spurt, so get organised to feed me often. In addition to gaining ounces, I am gaining muscle control. I will try to stay awake more and will begin to have the ability to focus on objects (your face is beautiful).

On the down side, this is generally the age when I may become a colicky baby which will make me cry (and cry and cry). Some 15 to 20 percent of newborns have inconsolable crying bouts that last for hours. (No one's really sure what triggers colic, but potential culprits include immature digestion, reflux, milk-supply problems, and environmental factors.)

Coping with colic is tough, but this phase will end (typically, colic peaks at six weeks and disappears by three months). Until then, there are many way you can help me by making sure I am not too warm or too cold. Don't be afraid to pick me up when I cry - but don't feel guilty about letting me cry for a few minutes either.

3-weeks-old
I know, I'm sorry for all the crying but you will soon get used to me as I'm trying to tell you something and I'm really sorry for all those explosive sounds coming from my bottom its just my digestive system kicking into high gear. Do I have a rash on my bottom? If so, don't worry, speak to my health visitor as she can advise you on what cream to put on me to make me feel better.

My vision, ability to focus, and concentration is slowly improving and I can see the teddy you keep waving in front of my face!

4-weeks-old
Am I speaking to you, well in my own way, yes - those grunts, groans, gurgles, and coos are my way of communicating with you mum and don't be surprised if you hear plenty of sneezes and hiccups as well (both are very common in infants.) I have also recently discovered my fingers, toes and thumbs and I love to suck my thumb

One month old
I'm getting stronger and already my legs are making walking movements - if you hold my feet on the ground I'll make a stepping motion. My hands are mostly closed but if you put your finger in my palm I'll grasp it and talk to me because I may start to copy your facial expressions.

It's not just wind I will start to smile in my sleep by the end of the month and I will also let you know by crying, as I can't speak to you yet, when I'm hungry or need my nappy changing .

5-weeks-old
I love to smile it means "I like that" or "I love you, Mummy." Talk and sing to me as the more you do, the more I will smile.

At my next doctors checkup, don't forget to ask about my injections - I will hate the needle but know I have to have them. If you haven't already, and you are breast feeding, you might want to introduce me to a bottle of your breast milk, as well as more learning-playing activities that'll stimulate my social development, motor skills, and senses.

6-weeks-old
My hand - eye coordination is getting much better, I love to grasp anything small, my sensory perception is growing as well so be sure to give me plenty of objects to look and grab at. I love the baby gym that grandma bought me, it keeps me amused for hours.

Don't forget to lie me on my back especially at bedtime, and remember I like a peaceful place to sleep and still need daytime rest to sleep well at night. You too can have a sleep when I do mum, it will recharge your batteries, the dirty dishes and ironing can wait till later.

7-weeks-old
I'm now a fast learner, I love to feel and touch things but quickly get bored and tired, I might even be starting to try and roll over and yes that was a giggle. Talk to me and tell me what you are doing, ask me questions as I love to hear your voice so I know I am not on my own.

2 months old
My eyes are now working together, I can focus better and can see out of the corners of my eyes. I can now see you mum, I knew you by smell from the day I was born. By the end of the month I should be kicking my legs and waving my arms when I get excited - hard to realise but this movement is preparing me for walking.

I'm started to make other noises besides crying, like cooing and gurgling, and I can smile lots too especially as I can now recognise your face and your voice.

Don't put that nappy on me yet! I love to feel the air on my skin. Carry me, talk and sing to me and give me lots of different things to look at - show me the birds outside anything to keep me stimulated.

3 months old
I like to splash about in the bath and you may hear my first laugh around the end of the month. My smiles are getting broader and I may respond to your higher-pitched voice more than dad's lower tones. My neck muscles are developing and I might even be able to hold my head up for a short time. Hold me up so my feet touch the ground to get me used to the feel of them.

Talk to me and give me time to answer with a gurgle - as I can stay awake for longer now I love the one-to-one me time with you mum. Don't let my brothers, sisters and cousins get too rough with me, I'm still only tiny but I love lots of cuddles.

4 months old
Wow I can now recognise familiar faces. I love to play and can now reach for objects, particularly brightly coloured ones, but beware, I think everything is food glorious food and will put everything in my mouth. Give me different textured things to play with like small soft toys and rattles, nothing to big or heavy though.

Goody, going out in the car again, don't forget to strap me in safely and securely and please give me something to play with or I will get bored, and you know what happens when I get bored - I cry!

5 months old
I can grasp objects now but my thumbs aren't working properly yet. I can also hold my head up and might be able to push myself into a sitting position - I'm getting stronger and stronger all the time and can even reach and wiggle to get those toys you have put out of my reach.

I can now tell the difference between you and a stranger and may cling to you mum if I'm tired or upset. But I'm not anti-social - I like meeting lots of other people but stay close mum so I know you are near.

Peek-a-boo, I love to play peek-a-boo or find items that are hidden. I'm getting clever now, and can pass a toy from one hand to the other or take a small object and then pick it up. I love to chat too, so keep talking to me even when I'm feeling cranky, it's usually because I may be teething, that's why I may have a red face or keep drooling.

Two other potentially pesky problems may be raising their ugly head, eczema and food allergies, as these often emerge around now, so look at what you are feeding me mum. Some babies are ready to start drinking from a cup, so give it a go and see if I am ready.

Yuk - what is that you are trying to put in my mouth - Mmmm well it's not that bad and I suppose it does taste good too. I know you are trying to get me to eat solids, but just a little at a time.

6 months old
I love you mum, and I'm very attached to you now and will miss you when you're not there, that's why I cry when I am with strangers.

I will be able to look for objects when I drop them. I may also be able to put weight on my legs and pull myself into a standing position using the furniture. I'm getting bigger every day and are starting to love the taste and texture of different foods but not too many at a time and stear clear of citrus foods until I am about 8 months old. Another tooth has arrived so I will soon be needing a tooth brush.

7 months old
My balance is improving and I may only need to hold onto the sofa with one hand. Make sure you move all those expensive items on the dresser as I love to pick things up that I shouldn't. You should also make sure that nothing I can get hold of can harm me in any way Mum, put away those matches, tablets and knitting needles. I'm using my hands in different ways, learning to poke with my fingers and reach for large toys with both hands together, and small objects with just one. I may also be able to wave bye-bye or blow kisses, I told you I'm getting clever now.

Give me little bits of food to eat that I can pick up with my hands - I love getting messy so put me in my high chair mum to save some of the mess.

I am starting to understand certain words you say, including my own name. I can imitate your actions and may raise my arms when I want to be picked up.

8 months old
I may be crawling, rolling, creeping now (though some babies are late starters) and becoming more curious about all objects, which I will prod, shake and bang on the floor. If interrupted I can go back to what I was doing and can deal with more than one object at once. I'm sorry the house is a mess Mum, but I love to play with everything and all at the same time.

I'm still wary of some new people and won't greet them happily like I used to - I will tell you in no uncertain terms that I only want to be with you mum so give me lots of cuddles so I feel safe and secure. And if you're back at work mum, my new nursery, nanny or childminder may be a bit daunting for me as I'm going to miss you. I will settle eventually, so it's no good feeling too guilty. Just make up for lost cuddles and kisses when you pick me up. Very often I will cry when you leave me but then I'll perk up pretty soon if I'm happy.

Can we go to baby signing, it's a good way for me to learn how to communicate with you and its good fun too. You will also get to meet other mums and can get some adult conversation too.

9 months old
My memory and awareness of familiar surroundings has developed and I can quickly recognise familiar and unfamiliar situations - this is why I'm still wary of strangers.

I can recognise the names of some people, places and objects and may know what certain commands mean like ‛Give' and ‛No'. Any time from now onwards I could utter my first ever proper word, like ‛bye' or ‛dada' but don't panic if I'm not talking yet - all babies develop differently.

I still love to eat and can now drink from a cup all by myself. Don't give me too many sweets or salty items and althought I may not like them as much, I need lots of vegetables, fruits and whole grains.

Another potential pitfall at the nine-month mark is a change in my sleeping pattens, some babies are ready to stop at least one of their daily naps while others decide they're ready for playtime instead of bedtime at night.

10 months old
I like to be around other babies and children - as long as I'm the centre of attention so take me to baby signing, and mother and baby groups. These are good for both of us mum, I get to play with my friends and you get to drink coffee and tea with yours.

Don't worry if I suddenly don't want to eat as much as normal, my growth is finally slowing down so my appetite will decrease as well. One thing that definitely won't decrease is my desire for discovery, which can lead to some serious climbing. I can get up but oh dear, I can't get down. I can also point to what I want and maybe able to stand alone or even take a few steps assisted - beware I will soon be running all over the house.

Some pretty strange behaviour problems may also start to occur including head banging, rocking, rolling, teeth grinding, and hair pulling. While no one's exactly sure why we do this, it may simply be a way of blowing off steam and are often triggered or increased by stress.

11 months old
I'm becoming more independent but still feel safer when you are near me as I don't like unfamiliar surroundings. I love games, especially those that involve pointing.

12 months old
Happy Birthday to me, I'm not a baby anymore. I can understand a lot of what people say to me and can speak a few words. I can hold a spoon and feed myself, and play games like pat-a-cake and building blocks. I love to play with other babies and small children but need encouragement to interact with them.

We are all unique and meet milestones at our own pace. Developmental guidelines simply show what we have the potential to accomplish - if not right now, then soon. If your baby was premature, keep in mind that usually babies born early need a bit more time to meet their milestones.

18-months-old
I'm growing up fast these days, walking, talking a little, and I even use a spoon or fork when I eat. I love to play "where's my nose?", "Where's my eyes?" and can put blocks in containers and take them out again. I can walk and run all by myself too, but am not steady on stairs and still fall over quite a lot.

My independence is growing too, I can dress and undress myself and like to decide what I want to wear. I also brush my teeth without help but make sure you're there to help and am getting used to having to sit on the potty and big toilet - I don't like having to sit there but I don't like having a dirty nappy either. I can sort things by colour, shape, and type, and my favourite word is "no". I'm a big person now and only need a nap after lunch to recharge my batteries - but I don't like my new bed.

2-years-old
Happy Birthday to me again - I can ride a bike! Expressing emotions is healthy, but beware I can now use my voice (using up to 300 words and understanding nearly 1,000), my fists, stamp my feet and have lots of crocodile tears. I now move around with confidence and can play unassisted and can make my wishes known. I am possessive of my possessions and don't like anyone to touch or take away my things. I love to sit and watch television and DVD's but not too much.

Every so often I may slide backwards in my development, if I have been sleeping during the night I may suddenly start and wake at 3.00 am. Or if I am potty trained I may suddenly have a few accidents, don't worry mum, I am so engrossed in other things I just forget - it's nothing to worry about.

Manners. I know I should be remembering to say please and thank you but I sometimes forget and need reminding. My favourite word of all time is "No". Preschoolers say ‛No to everything, because we are discovering own identity. Sometimes I will say No when I mean Yes, I get confused. If you give me choices, it is one way of reminding me what is on offer and I will then answer with a Yes or a No.

Your life now
"One, two, three!" An ability to count begins as your child heads toward 3, at least in a primitive way. First a child is able to identify when there is one, and more than one (though not whether it's two or six). By age 2, a child can count to two ("one, two"), and by 3, he can count to three, but if he can make it all the way up to 10, he's probably reciting from rote memory. Kids this age don't yet actually understand, and can't identify, the quantities they're naming.

Your child's last baby teeth, four "second molars," usually appear between 20 and 33 months. (Some kids are still cutting their other teeth during the third year.) Molars tend to be especially painful since they are large. Sometimes they're accompanied by mild fever. They may even cause your good sleeper to wake up crying in the night. Fortunately the pain doesn't last more than a day or two per tooth. Let your child gnaw on toys, his hands, or a frozen or very warm (not hot) wet washcloth if he's inclined until the discomfort passes. Many physicians recommend against topical oral medications because they can lead a child to suck or gnaw the gum long enough to create a sore.

3-years-old
Your child's growing world now includes everything from time in the dentist's chair to playdates with friends - and maybe even preschool. A better grasp of manners comes in handy now, as does a patient parent to teach fun new skills and help with potty-training backslides.

Imaginary friends
Been asked to set an extra place at dinner for an imaginary friend yet? As many as half of preschoolers have a pretend buddy. These phantoms don't mean your child is lonely or maladjusted. In fact, kids with imaginary friends are more likely to grow up to be creative, cooperative, sociable, independent, and happy.

Learning colours
Three-year-olds are beginning to learn colors. They can usually point to a color when asked and may be able to name four or more by midyear. Some fun ways to help them nail this skill.

Handling bed-wetting
Even if your child is basically potty trained by now, you can expect accidents, especially at night, for months or even years to come. Staying dry at night is the last step children master, and it tends to be harder for boys than for girls. But rest assured, most kids grow out of bed-wetting naturally. Most physicians don't consider it a problem until age 5 or 6.

Your little chatterbox
No more games of charades to decipher what your child wants. Thanks to his improved diction and amazing grasp of grammar, you should be able to understand more than three-fourths of what he's saying now. He uses longer sentences (three or more words) and a growing vocabulary (300 to 1,000 words - too many for you to count) to make himself understood.

Figuring out friendship
Your ever-more-independent child is probably starting to develop some friendships. But don't be surprised if, when you ask who her friends are, she recites her entire preschool class list. She doesn't fully understand the meaning of friendship yet. She may have favorites, but to her a "friend" is pretty much anybody she spends time with.

Ask most 3-year-olds how old they are and they'll proudly raise the correct number of fingers. Your child is starting to realize that those fingers he's holding up correspond to a number that has actual meaning. Don't be surprised if "three" is his favorite number - and the answer to every "How many?" question - for a while!

Catch this, kid!
Some call it the perfect toy. It doesn't require batteries, you can play just about anything with it, and chances are, you already have several at your house. What is it? A ball...

Say cheese
Your child probably has a full set of primary teeth. (The last of these, the second molars, usually come in by 24 months.) Though these baby teeth won't begin to fall out until 5 at the earliest (and more typically at age 6 or 7), it's important to keep them clean and cavity-free. Teeth are vital for proper chewing, and baby teeth create spaces for your child's permanent teeth.

Take that, teddy!
Preschoolers often work out complicated emotions in their play with animals, dolls, blocks, cars, or other playthings. A traumatic doctor visit, for example, could result in your child lining up all her teddy bears for shots. If she witnesses a car crash in real life or on TV, she may repeatedly smash toy trucks together.

One thing is for sure, all the frustration, challenges, stumbling block - each phase passes and a new one begins. Enjoy the journey with your children. It's magical.